Monday, November 15, 2010

Is it wrong to love a small appliance?

I posed this question on facebook a few days ago, after using my NEW food processor to make PERFECTLY sliced potatoes. Truly, they were lovely. Works of culinary art. I was terribly impressed. Nearly moved to tears by their uniform, perfect circles. An ode to the sliced potato.

OK, a bit of wine was involved in my romantic soliloquy. Specifically, Cameron Hughes Lot 141. Do you know about Cameron Hughes wines? He's a reseller - buys up excess of great vintages and then bottles and sells for significantly less than the original. He can't reveal the origin of the wine, but gives hints, and frankly, I've never had even a mediocre bottle. Sam's Club and Costco occasionally get shipments (if you sign up for the mailing list they'll notify you when new stock is delivered). For example, I got an email that a good Malbec (Argentine red) was going to be stocked at the Miami store. Since his South American sojourns began, Barry loves Malbec, so I trooped over and bought a case. The only problem is lack of storage space - I have Malbec tucked in multiple kitchen locations, giving the impression to the innocent visitor that I'm hiding bottles like a veteran alcoholic.

With or without the help of inebriation, I do love a good appliance. When I grew up, Mom had a portable mixer for cakes, but otherwise stirring, slicing, dicing and blending was all powered by the magic and skill of human hands.

Gasp.

Appropriate wonderment, murmurs of awe.

She LOVED the line "I have THREE dishwashers - Ann, Kirk, and Kim." Ha ha and ha.

After my marriage, Barry's parents gave us a food processor. I don't remember using it too much, except one fine holiday dinner when I thought "hey, I bet this would make GREAT mashed potatoes!" I did not fully appreciate the power of the processor. Rather than hitting pulse multiple times (pulse is the processor's friend), I turned it on and watched it go.

We had potato soup-ish yuk as a side dish that year.

Chris was helping me prepare for Home Made Pizza Night last Friday. In a special, touching, mother-son-passing-the-torch moment, I allowed him to be in charge of "The Pulse". And, I was (cue to wipe away sentimental tear) amazed at his ability to chop pepperoni, onion (ok, maybe the onion was almost goo), and peppers like a pro. AND, as a bonus, his lingering twitch has diminished - developed from my, ah, insistent kibitzing "NO! Stop!...ok...wait...a little more....STOP!...ok, ok...no, no...be patient...just a few more...STOP!"

My second most favorite appliance is my Kitchen Aid Mixer! Mixer-o-mine, how do I love thee? Now HERE is a device that makes mashed potatoes without any disaster. Cookies? Ingredients, mix, slap on the sheets, into the oven - VOILA! I got it for my birthday about 15 years ago, and I remember sharing the thrill with my friend Maryann. She was less than impressed and I believe lectured her husband about NEVER giving her a small appliance as a gift. HA! Bring them ON I say! My friend has all the attachments - she uses her Kitchen Aid to grind meat, make pasta, and change the oil on her cars. IT'S AMAZING!

And what about...the Blender? Who can say enough about the sweet, sweet blades that blend frozen strawberry mix, rum and ice into a magical moment on a weekend afternoon? We survived a tragic day yesterday. While putting together our traditional Football Sunday frozen drink and special snack (this Sunday: fudge cupcakes - done baking before they are "done" and are eaten warm with gooey, leaking chocolate - RAPTURE!), the blender DIED! Mournfully unresponsive, the useless motor base was crowned by the glass carafe awash with cubes and mix, all floating, miserably unable to transform. We wept, then, dehydrated, we were forced to drink - prepare yourselves! - ice WATER. However, we managed to pull ourselves together by indulging in a second cupcake.

Our ability to cope with domestic crisis is legendary.

Do NOT panic!!!! Macy's is having a ONE DAY sale on Wednesday. Well, it's a ONE DAY sale on TWO days - and I'll be there bright and early on Tuesday for the early bird blender special.

And so Ann's World continues to turn:)

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