I thought you were my friend!

I've blogged before about my enamourment with Jen Lancaster - her books and blog, Jennsylvania.

In order to appreciate her particular perspective, I'd strongly advise reading her books, memoirs of the last few years. She has a delightful, biting sense of humor. Ms. Lancaster mocks herself and the world around her. To read her is to get to know her, which, as a recent blog entry revealed, can be problematic:

Caveats, Conversation, and Conservatism

To summarize, Jen had not written a blog entry in some time. She was busy, writing a novel and another memoir. She received an abundance of email, complaining about the lack of blog, as well as presumptuous requests for lunch dates, meetings, travel, etc. Some people railed against her weight (she has a BOOK about fighting her "Pretty Fat"), her conservatism, and other personal issues - issues she has openly shared in her books.

I would guess this is a common problem for women of fame - especially those who put their lives our there as part of their entertainment product. After I moved to Miami, I was in a real funk. I still don't have the social life/network I did in Chicago. I began to personalize my relationships with my "TV friends". I SWEAR I believed I could be best friends with Ellen Degeneres, Martha Stewart (I know she's tough, but I'm laid back enough to take it. Come on...she has her own SHEEP and CHICKENS. We could declutter my closets and then make PIE! Who wouldn't want her as a friend?), and Judge Milan from the People's Court (Marilyn - as I like to call her - lives in Coral Gables! I have a shot at this one.). I love the humor and presence of Paula Poundstone on "Wait, Wait, Don't Tell me!" OH, and Joyce Meyer, the minister - I LOVE her!


Each of these women (or those you each love, like Oprah, Whoopi or Rosie) is charismatic and appealing. That's the attraction, and that's the trap. We know, but we don't know these people. We have an attachment to them, but...here's the hard part...they don't have an attachment to us. In a broad, general way, they do - we're their audience. We ARE the people they relate to - otherwise, they wouldn't be successful. Yet, it must be hard to work diplomatically around the intimacy we feel, which might be quite intense, and the fact THEY DON'T KNOW US FROM ADAM.

I haven't stalked my favorites, haven't written any personal appeals for lunch, money, or board games (Ellen? Want to come over Friday??). But during the more lonely times, I could see how easy it might be to cross the line between being entertained and being deluded.

I guess I'll end by saying that I appreciate these women's willingness to put themselves out publicly - whether for entertainment or evangelism. It's their calling, and while it is glamorous and exciting to be famous, there's a downside. We have to respect the boundaries between personal and public life. We need to acknowledge, maybe a little wistfully, that we most likely will not have the opportunity to nosh with Oprah, or glue gun with Martha, or talk a little Romans with Joyce.

Repeat after me: Reality...Entertainment....Reality...Entertainment.

Chose REALITY. Enjoy entertainment!

P.S. Martha, Paula, Ellen, Joyce, Marilyn, Jen - call me! I'm open for lunch...